Sharing this cuz my sister is making me.

A few months back my nephew got a new cell phone, called me from it and I saved it in my contacts on my phone.  Now anytime I send him a text I send it to the old phone (which he still has), the new phone and his wifes phone.  I want to make sure they get the msg.

Yes, I know I should seek counseling.

Anyhoo, I’ve been begging for pictures of my nephews wife’s belly.  She is pregnant with twins.  Weighs about 100 pounds and I’m told that at 3 months she is HUGE.  So I’m dying to see her.  Finally they send a picture of her belly.  She has her shirt pulled to expose the belly and it is true…she is super big.  Basketball’ish.  While we all think its adorable, we try to not tease her.  Worried she will think we are making fun or calling her fat.  Which she is not….just very pregnant.  And beautiful.

So.  My brilliant mind.  I decide to send a picture of my hubby’s gut to her to make her feel better and to add some humour to it all.  He has a beer gut going on and this amazing ability to pop his gut out to appear pregnant himself.  

He’s mine ladies.

So he poses, I snap the shot of just his belly on the cell and send it off to all three phones.  Immediately I get a response from my nephews new phone saying “who is this”.  I say….. “its my hubby LOL”.  New phone texts back and says, all I see if a fat belly and no face.

I immediately think – ok, my nephew is obviously slow.  This is funny.  He should be laughing.  So I say more clearly and slowly cuz you know, you can totally do that in a text “dude – its George, doesnt this make Shannon feel better”?

A text comes back saying “no.  This is my 13 yo daughters cellphone and I do not appreciate you sending naked pictures to it”.

Pause.

Uhm.

Mike is screwing with me.  badfeelingohmygoddidisendthistothewrongnumberohmygodohmygod.

No, wait.  This is the new cell phone.  Could there be a prob with new cell phone?

I call Mike.  He doesnt answer.  I call my sister who I also sent the photo to.  Yes, we are a warped family.  You are the one still reading.    That makes you just as bad you know. 

My sister pee’s herself laughing so hard.

Some people get the kind, loving, compassionate sister.  I get the one who laughs when I fall up a curb, dress blowing over head and then makes me walk home 5 blocks on a foot that I just broke in 12 spots. 

But I’m not bitter.

Anyhoo.  Unable to reach Mike, it is determined that this ‘new cellphone’ is the one that he took back.  He didnt like it so he returned it.  And obviously someone got his new number.  And beer gut pics of my hubby.

And some where out on MySPace there is a 13 yo girl who posted said photo with a caption of “like, oh my god, this really old guy just sent me like, a naked photo”.

Moral of the story:  Keep in better contact with your family and friends.  Or your hubby too could be potentially arrested for sending obnoxious photos to children.

Meme’s.  As far as the eye can see.  Cluttering my brain.  Making me laugh, furrow my brow and google strange stuff. 

But here you go.

Oh, and you are tagged.  For both. 

Oh, I said it.

From the ever lovely Kim:

Step 1: Put your itunes or equivalent on random.
Step 2: Post the first line [or so] from the first 25 (20!!) songs that play, no matter how embarrassing.
Step 3: Bold out the songs when someone guesses correctly.
Step 4: Looking them up on google or any other search engine is CHEATING.

Using my Equivalent, I got:
1. I had to meet you here today, there’s just so many things to sayyyyy

2. Wanna be right here where we are til my dying day (2^nd line, 1^st had title)

3.  Maryanne and Wanda were the best of friends all thru their high school days

4.  Cant push me down now, I’m drawing the line

5.  Guess I just lost my husband, I don’t know where he went.

6.  Well my heart knows me better than I know myself so I’m gonna let it do all the talking

7.  Treated me kind, sweet destiny

8.  You were so blind to let me go, you had it all but did not know

9.  Gonna make a change for once in my life

10.  I’m too sexy for my love, loves going to leave.  (did I judge YOUR song choices??)

11.  Well if you told me you were drowning, I would not lend a hand (2^nd verse)

12.  When I wake up, yeah I know I’m gonna be I’m gonna be the man who wakes up next to you.

13.  Poor old Johnny Ray sounded sad upon the radio
14.   No I’ll stand my ground, won’t be turned around (2^nd verse)

15.  Left a good job in the city, working for the man every night and day.

16.  I…am so in love with you….whatever you wanna do…is alright with me

17.  I’m riding in your car, you turn on the radio.

18.  Do you remember the 21^st of September

19.  Well you done done me and you bet I felt it

20.   I’m thru with standing in lines to clubs I’ll never get in.

Go on.  Guess away. 

****************************************************

From she who has the most handsome cat evah – Laurie: 

(imagine a lovely award photo here) (I can’t save the pic for some reason)

The Rules…  

The Honest Scrap Award means you must say ten honest things about yourself. 

1. I really really hate the fact that I have such an awful haircut.  Oh sure, I say things like “its just hair, it’ll grow out” but on the inside I am so very pissed at the stylist.  Vanity is so uncool. 
2. I hate to talk on the phone.
3. I bite my thumb nails.  Like…really, really bite them. 
4. I fear my love of reality tv is killing my brain cells.
5. I don’t make friends easily.
6. I love to lay in bed eating sunflower seeds while reading a book.
7. I lie about my weight on my drivers license.
8. I really hate this whole ‘getting older’ thing.  “Ma’am” is the worst.
9. I’ve never worn a bikini.  Well, thats a lie.  But when you are eight – it doesnt count.  As an adult…I’ve never worn one.  I won’t even wear shorts in the summer. 
10.  I want an Iphone thingie.  Although I tell my hubby I could care less about them.  I really…really want one. 

After all of the honesty, you pass it along

Yesterday I picked up knitting after a couple weeks of avoidance. 

Its still too early for the hands.  Numb and sore.

Babies are coming in October. 

Panic setting in….what if I’m forced to buy store-bought blankies?

This is not how I envisioned the whole blankie scenario.  I imagined that I’d make the most wonderful, lush, long lasting blankie ever.  And that the twins would keep it forever as their special blankie.  Given someday to their children.  And then their children’s children. 

Yes, the blankie would be made of superman like yarn.  To last hundreds of years.

It’s my story.

Anyhoo.  Starting to get a little pissed off at my body.

It’s her birthday.   She’s had a rough year.  And she is turning 30.  The 20’s are over.  Go…console her. 

Happy Birthday Chick!!!!   Giftie on the way….late…but on the way!!!

How lazy are you Rox?

I’m so lazy that I can’t bear the idea of going thru the hassle of opening the laptop & powering it up (I had “turning it on” there but that sounded naughty) (hey, like you wouldnt of thought it too) just so I can upload photos from the camera. 

Now, thats lazy.

And I think Java is a lovely name.  It is actually Greek for ‘daughter of the most handsome man evah’.  They had no choice but to name her that.

It’s not always easy being the king hunka hunka.

I love this

Why….do some people who have kids…feel that I am a freak because I do not?

I just spent 24hrs with an old friend who spent the entire time telling me “you should of have kids, Rox”. 

It was soooo much fun.   <this would be sarcasm since you can’t see my eye roll and head shake> 

Nothing like a blast from the past reminding you that your uterus has failed you.  And because of this you are not quite whole/complete in their eyes.

Hmph.

My Josh wants to kick her ass but I’m holding him back. 

So angry.  So hot. 

Sigh.

It seems I am not the only one in a blog funk lately. 

Is this normal.  Does one need a break from the blog on occasion?  To come back refreshed and brimming with new exciting topics.

Or are blogs kind of moving into a thing of the past.

After a few years of blogging and making such wonderful friends via this means – I wonder if I can just let it go.   Just my being absent for a few months has affected friendships I’ve made here.  Which is totally my fault – I could call, email, yada.  But I get busy with other day-to-day things. 

Maybe its just a phase. 

Maybe its a sign.

Maybe I think too much.

I’ve got the cooking/baking urge going on today.  Especially after seeing the homebaked bread S Diddy made this week. 

Any ideas?

 

 

**edited to add….we went with cheesesteak.  Takeout. 

At first I thought….calm down people.  Give it time.  Everything is going to be ok.  Just have to be patient.

Then our mortgage went up.

A little panic. 

No problem.  I’ll get more hours at work, we’ll stop eating out and forget about the trip abroad I’ve been dreaming about this year.

Then the layoffs at my hubby’s work.  Hitting a bit too close to home.  Lovely, wonderful, hard working people being laid off.  Being caught by surprise and doing the walk of shame out of the ofc with that look of shock on their face.  Not only is George stressing about losing his job but he is the guy that is being forced to give some their pink slips.  Not his idea but its a dirty job and the new guy that everyone likes is the one they choose for this task from hell.

But he still has his job.  Right now.

A little more panic.  Nothing some chips and dip can’t handle.

My job is lucky to be hiring right now.  Want to know about some of the candidates I’ve interviewed lately?  One guy was a restaurant owner with a masters in journalism.  Another managed 200+ people in his last job.  Another made double my hubby’s salary.  And they all are competing for a seat next to mine.  While I feel really bad about them being in this situation, I’d be lying if I said I was not feeling a bit threatened with my job security right now.  Why have me….. when you can have superhero “Bill” at a lesser payrate?

Pannniiiic

Fine.  Turns out I am one of those people starting to freak out a wee bit.  Ok, more than a wee bit.  I actually told my hubby we should buy a used cheap RV that we could live in if we were to lose the house.

I’ve been homeless.  20 years ago, but without a home nonetheless.  Not a fun time.  An RV would of been like a fabulous suite at a expensive hotel. 

I read about others in similar situations.  Feeling the pinch. Concerned about the future.  So I know we are not alone.

But….still not diggin it….and still looking for a cheap RV.